That best of all policies

As Spencer Johnson said, “Integrity is telling myself the truth. And honesty is telling the truth to other people.”

I had a confession to make.

Melinda and I both planned to break it off with our spouses so we could be together. I did, but something I never expected to happen happened; after a heartfelt talk, I slept with my wife.

Just as it happened with Sandra after my past life experience back in 1574 where I’m forgiven by the community because I am honest with them, I’m rewarded for my honesty with Melinda. She was relieved; she had slept with her spouse in the same situation.

We are both rewarded for our honesty with each other.

I have no regrets…

Make no mistake, the Living Universe has given both of us that shot at redemption.

Have you ever been rewarded for your honesty?


Don’t take it up the kazoo: recognize shitty situations

kazoo, instrument, humPast lives. For fuck’s sake. I’ve heard of weird people who thought they were Cleopatra or Napoleon or the really, really twisted ones who thought they were both. But I remember when I met Melinda for that first time and the tarot reading where she reckoned she and I had an itch that needed scratching in a past life.

All this whacking that’s been going round of late and my developing feelings for Melinda, well, it takes the steam out of my cynicism and really, not much surprises me now. Or so I think. But Brian Muir is very serious about this topic and after this long study, he came up with some conclusions centring on unconditional love.

Now this strikes a real chord with me. Somehow I know this unconditional love and what it means I don’t know I know, but I know. It’s about love, the positive emotion that underlies Masaru Emoto’s experiments with water crystals in “What the Bleep do We Know?” Love we show our kin, love we show strangers. Love we bestow on our enemies. What the fuck! Our enemies? Let me explain.

water crystal, What the Bleep Do We Know?Unconditional love is not totally about turning the other cheek nor about letting a shitty situation go, becoming indifferent. It’s about treating people how you like to be treated and it’s about not taking it up the kazoo. You are never the doormat. Nobody ever deserves to be walked over and unfairly dominated. And I remember my old boss Bucky saying: you condone what you accept.

Make no mistake, I believe we have an inherent right to defend ourselves, but only to that level that sees off the threat. Flight or fight, as in nature, and this is extremely important to remember. Nature normally gives us a clue in all things if we choose to look with our eyes, listen with our ears and most importantly, feel with our hearts, as I found during my time in the wilderness some years later. But I’m jumping ahead of myself.

Muir’s book comes with a guided meditation to a past life in the form of a CD and I’m thinking I might try this past life stuff and see what happens. I’m open to it. And what happens is the stuff those terrible nightmares are made of – fuck my little brown dog, I better strap myself in for this one…


Rude Awakenings and Chicken Chokings

So here I am, sitting in the shadows of this room wondering what the bloody hell is going on, which sort of matches the way my life’s been panning out these last few years.

Light from the side alley strains through the curtains of the lone window, trying to reach the far corners of this dimly lit room. Maybe even trying to reach the far corners of my dimly lit spirit. But the light is bright enough for me to see the other folk in the room and fuck it all, bright enough for them to see me. Right now, I’m feeling damn uncomfortable.

Light, curtains, darkness, window, shadesI’m nervously fidgeting on the inside like I’ve a belly full of beer and bad gas. I want to melt into this corner, I want to sit still and I won’t be talking to anyone, otherwise the rest of them will notice and then I’ll be rooted. And definitely no eye contact. It’ll all be over soon then all that’s needed is a short, sharp exit out the door, down the road and back into the reality and sanctuary of my home that is my daughter’s garage. I’m not too sure what’s going on here, in fact I have no idea what’s going on so for now, I’ll just go with the flow and shut the fuck up, all the while thinking what a bit of bullshit this is.

As I wait for Melinda to start the meditation, I begin to feel really weird, which really suits this place and the people here. What have I let myself in for?

I’m not scared, just… apprehensive and more than a little uncomfortable. That nervous fidgeting on the inside remains as I want to scratch my bum and reset my meat and potatoes but civility scores a rare win and I suffer in silence.

My hands and feet start to go twilight zoning, all tingly and resonating like the pins and needles blokes get when they sit on their hand to make it go quite numb for reasons of male self gratification – good ol’ choking the chicken. Faarrrk. I haven’t felt this in my 48 years of walking this Earth. What in Hell is going on?

Melinda glides into the room like she’s on roller skates and serenely takes her seat. She asks us to concentrate on our breathing, to purposefully slow it down, to relax.

I gently inhale, pause, then exhale in the well controlled manner Melinda asks of us. She wants us to relax our feet, ankles, then legs all the way up to our faces and head.

man's brain, sex, food, sleepMelinda then tells us to relax our consciousness by simply not thinking and in a short time my mind starts slowing down – like it doesn’t have to slow down all that much as it’s already in a low state of tune. And not thinking is a specialty of mine so I’m feeling oh so very clever in a bloke kind of way – ladies and dogs know what I’m talking about.

And I’ve got to say this relaxing thing feels really good. Nearly as good as the aforementioned chicken choking. But not quite.

The thoughts of the day are sliding away, being replaced with a certain coolness and calm I have previously only ever felf when I was knocked out playing rugby. I swear my head and neck are disconnected from my shoulders, which they nearly were after I was kneed in the groin and kicked in the head that afternoon on the football field at Cowra back in ’81. Today is same same but thankfully different.

Man I like this.


I guess you can call this faith

The synchronicities, the milestones, the smack between the eyes with that No. 2 wood – as sure as shite they’re all conected.

I now view myself in that positive, healthy way and things started to happen, to flow – I’ve started swimming with the current out of my own volition.

I’m learning not to pull on the reigns too tightly, not to overly control the situation, but rather give life its head, go with the flow and just simply learn to recognise the synchronicities, the milestones, the happy coincidences that point the way forward.

faith, spirituality, Living Universe

Found at

Trust the Living Universe to provide because it will if you believe and let it do its thing. I know as it now happens all the time though it must have a wok eye sense of humour as it near always waits til the last minute to come through. Takes a bit of courage, so it does and I guess you can call this faith.

So if you seek the truth, maybe the best place to start is with yourself…


Depression is Unhealthy

The cycles of depression are still there and seem to wash over me for days at a time. I can feel it happening.

Typically, I’ll start by withdrawing from the world, triggered by a stoush with Mitch or some other bad news. I then stay isolated in my room, curtains closed, doors locked, phone off the hook and mostly in bed.

After a number of days, sometimes maybe a week or more, I gradually emerge on the other side as my mood lightens for no apparent reason. I tell you, it’s one bastard of a ride and I wish it on no one.

Talking to my counsellor Anne every other week definitely helps so I’m sort of functioning. Sort of.

scale, weight, diet, unhealthyMy cycle of depression takes it toll on other facets of my life. I become fat and unhealthy. Over the years, the lifestyle I chose at Mungindi made it all too easy to gain weight and not only did this impact on my health, it did no favours for my mental well-being either.

What all facets of your life have been affected by your depression?


Breaking waves break me

The passing of a close family member, economic debt, and loss of passion in my marriage, plus my attitude about all of the above, threw me into depression in 2005.

Waves, storm, seaI describe this period in my life as trying to swim through heavy surf, trying to swim past the breaking waves and out into calmer waters of a profitable and sustainable business. Every time I’d swim out, an incoming wave of bad news would dump on me, busting my arse and pushing me back to the shoreline, back to where I’d started.

Successive attempts met with the same result.


At first I was strong, and I just swam back out only to meet the ever stronger waves. Gradually, I tired. But I still think I’m ten foot tall, still bullet proof and fucking invincible so I’ll just crash my way through – I just didn’t recognise that I wasn’t and couldn’t.

I was still spinning the truth, fooling myself into believing I had the faith and the confidence in my own ability to stay afloat. Didn’t I tell you that I could do just about anything? Anything, except make it to the calm waters beyond the breakers.

But the real ugly truth is that I was becoming unhealthy in mind as well as in body. And the soul? Well, don’t worry about that. And I didn’t.

Is this how depression feels to anyone else?


Michael’s U.S. Tour Breaks Record

Atlanta, Congress Center, Georgia Dome, Michael Riddell

I made it to Atlanta!

You can see here I survived my trip from Australia, to Los Angeles, to Atlanta.


Booksigning, Michael Riddell, Life, Little Brown Dog, Shite Like That, Aussie author

Here's the set-up for my booksigning

Atlanta is where I set a new record for signing all my books!


Booksigning, Aussie author, Michael Riddell, Life, Little Brown Dog, Shite Like That

Going through all the books I brought

Not sure if the crowds enjoyed me or the little brown dog better.


Past life regression, guru, Brian Weiss, Michael Riddell, Balboa Press

Me and my new mate Brian Weiss, the guru of past life regression at the book signing

Next stop on the tour, Washington, D.C. Hope they’re ready for me!


Invite chaos into your life

How do you know the path ahead is the right path for you?

Michael Riddell, Whippet, man and his dog, man's best friend, author, UniverseHow do you recognize the little tell tale signs that point the way forward?

How do you sort the truth, your truth, from all of the bullshit, spin and deception?

How do you even know what your destiny is?

Come with me on my journey, and I’ll show you how a middle aged bloke with a busted arse and middle aged little brown dog did it.

My story is true, no lies, no spin and definitely not warm and fuzzy. It is what it is, and you can make your own conclusions.

I’m not asking you to go where I went as although the fundamentals seem to be the same, everyone’s journey is thankfully different. It’s how I found my destiny, where I needed to go which by the way, was not where I wanted to go. But fate had other ideas…

I’m sitting here a few years down the track and I can honestly say there is a lot more to this world than meets the eye. A lot more. My journey is living proof but really, believing is the only way of seeing.

Am I a better human because of this journey? Yes I am! I do not live in fear as the Universe does really provide if you know where to look. If you know how to look. If you listen with your heart. I have found my peace.

And this is the secret of how the Living Universe ticks and I’ll show you guys how as well.

But be cynical. I don’t want you to take my word for it as I have nothing to prove. At least to myself.

So invite a little chaos and the odd revolution into your lives, if only in thought and see what happens.


Blokes have souls, too

Having sex is like playing bridge – if you don’t have a good partner, you’d  better have a good hand.

Or so says Woody Allen.

This quote has nothing to do with this chapter. I just put it in as I think it’s funny. But it does go to show you don’t have to be straight-laced to find your soul, to be out there. Having fun and being funny is integral to being a human being. In fact, I’d go so far to say that being straight laced is a hindrance to finding your soul – although some would say it seems a pre-requisite to being religious. Of course, I couldn’t possibly comment.

But I can comment on a boofheaded bloke like me finding his soul and why you might want to as well. Fuck my little brown dog, the mere idea of blokes with souls sounds like a disease of plague proportions, right up there with zombies, lepers and dogs with rabies. Why is this so?

I have no idea except to tell you what I have seen.

You see, females I have known reckon many blokes are like prawns – hard shell, soft underbelly, head full of shite but aren’t the meaty bits tasty! Most of my mates feel uncomfortable as they open up their soft side as it takes them clean out of their comfort zone when they talk about stuff that makes them feel all soft, feminine and in the eyes of adversaries and mates alike, just plain weak.

Life, A Little Brown Dog, and Shite Like That, book, self help, memoirAs my old footballing coach would say, from here it’s only a short cuddle to playing for the other team and not too many men want this. Or at least be caught out in the open. But there is one hell of a difference between blokes expressing their love and compassion for a mate and tapping them on the shoulder with a twinkle in their eye and a bulls eye on their bum.

I suppose society since the dawn of time dictated that men do the hard physical and important tasks and ladies do the washing up and that’s the way it is. But I’m here to say blokes can be hunter gatherers, they can find their soul although at times it is hard to be seen as soft, especially when mates take the piss.

Sometimes you have to be tough to be soft, to have muscles on the inside, which I guess is what a soul amounts to be. In fact this inner strength complements the bloke no matter if you have rippling abs or rippling jelly for a stomach. So what makes me different?

Melinda reckons I’ve an open mind, an ability to look deeper into the role playing façade that is everyday life. The stuff that challenges me – well I’m open to being challenged then having the balls to change my views if needed.

Why would I put myself through this shite when to believe in this new age  stuff is to be seen as a girl? Why should blokes want to find their soul? What’s the upside?

Well, I’d be bullshitting if I said I knew the definitive answer, but what I do know it has everything to do with finding the truth, your truth, and the best place to start is with yourself. In doing so, a door will open showing the way forward for you to become way better at being human. At being a bloke. Lecture alert! Lecture alert! Righto, righto, I hear you.